The Motivational Interviewing Path to Personal Change by Michelle L. Drapkin

Author:Michelle L. Drapkin
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: New Harbinger Publications
Published: 2023-07-27T00:51:03+00:00

R-reasons: What are some reasons you might want to make this change?

N-need: Why do you need to make this change? What makes it important to you?

C-commitment: How committed are you to making this change?

A-action: What actions are you doing to make this change? What are you ready, willing, or preparing to do?

T-taking steps: What steps have you already taken toward the change?

Wait… Did you capture reading this book in your change talk above? You are reading these words, holding this book, giving it at least some of your attention. That is action for sure. You will also notice that sometimes in the change journey you don’t give yourself credit for the steps you are taking. Try to use your nonjudgmental awareness muscle to take in the whole field of DARN-CATs—the big and small parts of change.

You also might have noticed, as you were thinking or writing, that the opposite of change talk was coming up—that is, language that supports sustaining your current behaviors, the status quo, your baseline; what we call “sustain talk.” Basically, anytime you catch yourself thinking or talking about staying the same, you are using sustain talk. And, sorry to break it to you, but the more you talk about staying the same, guess what? The more likely you are to not change. This is a meaningful point, so start to listen to yourself and be aware of where you are in your change journey. Remember stages of change from chapter 2? This is all related.

When you were thinking about your DARN-CATs, you might have heard a little voice in your head saying, Yes, but… and felt drawn to qualify. I really want to stop drinking, but I haven’t been able to do it before. Or, My doctor says I need to watch my sugars, but I have a sweet tooth. Or, I want to get healthier, but I have failed so many times before. Or, I really want to write that novel/run that marathon/pursue my true calling, but I am not a disciplined enough person to succeed.

It can help to be mindful of the “Yes, but’s.” This is a tough one. We often catch ourselves saying or thinking, Yes, but… I sometimes watch a patient’s face and as I notice their brow furrow, I’ll ask, “What is the ‘Yes, but’ in your head?” We are so great about giving some change talk and then snatching it back or dampening it with some sustain talk after the “but.” “I really want to work out regularly, but I am so busy.” “I need to start flossing, but I keep forgetting.” “I started reducing my drinking, but just can’t stick with it.”

Quick piece of advice to take or leave. First, flip the script, literally: start with sustain talk and next change “but” to “and” so you get “I am so busy and I really want to work out regularly.” Or, like my vaping patient, “I am so used to vaping and it’s not consistent with who I want to be.

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